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| So after deleting my bookmark of my xanga site nearly two months ago, I completely lost track of this blasted thing. A link to an acquaintance's profile refreshed my stale memory, and now here I am, staring at this infinite void of a typing space while listening to mellow music (You know how I know you're gay? You like Coldplay). Oh, what memories this endeavor brings to the forefront of my mind!
Memories are what have been giving me a hard time lately. Every song a hear, everytime something says a familiar phrase, something reveals itself from the past six months, which I will kindly refer to as the best time of my life. I've been trying to seperate those times from my current experiences, collectively known as College, but as much as I try,to erase [them], the more that [they] appear, to quote a lyric from my buddy Mr. Yorke. This problem has led to me living a slightly double life. One where I wander this world at Kent and complete, if that is what you want to call it, my studies. The other exists in my mind, where I continually dwell in the happy times that I have consequently left behind. Surely a time will come where these memories are replaced, however, I do not wish them to be. Shit needs to stay cool, how it is.
I will either post again or slaughter this xanga were it currently stands, barely erect and held up only by it's pathetic walking stick.
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| Quite a bit of blasphemy has occured as of late, some of it has been in direct consequence of things I have done, the rest is just sort of hitting me like bugs being murdered on a windshield.
My last day of work is tomorrow. I want to veg out before I head to school.
An old friend is visiting this week. It is good to see him.
There are people here who I would stay for in heartbeat.
My best friend doesn't want to talk to me.
I'm out of money.
It feels like I have no time.
I was suppose to cancel my napster subscription two weeks ago.
I bought this game that I can't play because it scares the bejesus out of me.
I went to Cedar Point. It was one of the best times I've had all summer.
I want to see Steve Carrell's newest movie but it is an indie film and I can't find it playing anywhere.
I'm bored.
American Woman, stay away from me.
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| I woke up this morning later than I had hoped, thus resulting in a mood of anger, and as I stumbled out of bed and made the three foot journey to my computer chair I became even more enraged: the very intraweb that I write on now, to you, was disconnected, which was unfortunately exactly how I had found it when I came rambling through my bedroom door at nearly 1:30 in the early morn of this very day. As I inquired to my sibling whether or not his personal computer may have had the same foul disease, I became prone to the fact that the loss of connection was not due to a malfunction, nay, it was premeditated by my elders. This treachery would not last, however, at least in my mind. In all actuality it lasted nearly half the day, until my father came home and redistributed the wealth, but I simply put it out of my mind...I did not wish to be in an upset state of mind, so I went to the only place, wait two places, where nothing matters: my own mind and the hammock.
I lounged in this hammock for nearly an hour before being compelled to do any work, the very work that I had procrastinated on to recieve my unendowment of cyberspace. But while I lounged (because thats what monkeys do), I read some prose by a critic long dead, and was enlightened by his merciless wordage. He was reviewing a new disc by Bob Dylan, and although he had no problem with the music, it seemed (at least most of it), he had a problem with Dylan's "poetic license" when it came to how he told his folk stories. He went as far as doing background research on one of Dylan's tales, and found out whether or not Dylan was being straight with him, which to a degree, he was not. Enlightening...this man takes his music in stride and I like it. I'm compelled to read more.
I'm afraid I may have let someone down at some point over the last few days. I'll be honest I don't know how I did so, and I'm, oddly enough, not yet certain as to who I may have let down, but I have an inkling somewhere in the depths of my being (surprising, since I lack a soul), and I usually take heed to such things.
I have the weekend off, the entire weekend, something that happens not enough, but that is the sort of business I am in. But alas there is only 1.5 months left before my fallout, and one segment of that 1.5 (perhaps .33 of it, that would be one third for you math wizzzzzzes) is going to be free time due to the fact that my family has recieved intelligence that a different branch of my family tree will be visiting for nearly a week. I am excited. As for this weekend off, I believe a trip to Sandusky may be in order, there are a few coasters I have yet to experience...
My body requires nourishment, I will bid you farewell until my next un-thought provoking post.
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| Except for work and making those monies, I cannot complain.
On this wonderful day off I went swimming at the guy's house who had the grad party my last post was about (that post has put me in a spot of trouble, by quite the fault of my own), and it was certainly a good time. Wendys, water, and reese thingies that were delectable.
I left that party hoping to have another with a different pal which, sadly, was delayed for a quite a few hours. In fact it was nearly a decade that had passed before this girl finally got around to visiting (obviously joking, but it felt like that long), and during that time i played on this new gadget I obtained, read some odd writing from the late 1960's, and slept, and all of it being done outside in my brand spankin new hammock, which although i was at first skeptical have grown quite attached to it. So she arrived and we took off, grabbed some energy drinks, partied, and crashed as a result of the aforementioned energy drinks. (They all taste the same, I've decided.)
I was scared I was going to feel like a loser tonight, but it turned out better than I could've hoped, except for the bakers dozen of mosquito bites I acquired from my hammock time...I need to invest in some bug death torches.
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| I cannot even begin to explain the complete satisfaction that I have experienced over the last few days. So much has occured that is not at all exciting, and yet these just might be the best of times (styx). Working evenings allows for me to sleep in, and then I wake up and lie around for a few hours before going to work then I come home and do randomness until I sleep. This cycle is often interupted by what I like to call a day off. This is when what I would like to call "The Light" truly shines. For example...
Saturday was a supposed day off. I did, however, have to go into work at 7:00 in the morning. Because I don't like rushing in the morning I get up way earlier then I need to, so I found myself hitting the alarm at 5:45 that morning. The night before I had neglected to hit the sack until 3:00, thus sleep deprivation seemed like it would be my downfall, and this was a certain pickle for Saturday had multiple graduation parties lying in wait. So after this two hour meeting (more like a rape party), I went home and I finished scrapping my computer together until 13:00 when my party began. For the first hour...I believe there was a grand total of 3 different people who showed, but it got quite a bit more fancy after that. Once 16:00 rolled around, I kicked everyone out so I had time to visit my friends parties with my pal foster. On the drive around I found myself slipping into fits of sleepiness and this was a problem. So between visits I snatched one of those Full Throtle things. Red Bull packs more of a kick in my humble opinion. We made our way out to New Carlisle, which ended up being our final destination for the evening. This escapade was the best time I've had in a while. Most of it was nothing special, but sometimes you just feel real good about things and just everything works and theres nothing wrong and you've got nothing to complain about (cept one thing that you can't help you know?) and you are just simply having a damn good time. Thats how it was. Plus this guy's sister was...well...you know. Speaking of this guy...jesus, he has his shit together. The ideas this man has are things fools cannot even dream of dreaming. It's incredible. Plus he has a pool. Anyways I'm pretty sure this past Saturday was one of my best days so far, and I'm pretty sure it was the longest day of my life.
I wouldn't've had it any other way. That is a double contraction. Eat that.
Sorry if that big ass paragraph doesn't hold your attention, but I didn't write it for everyone.
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